No Grey Area

You don’t even know you’ve slipped, when you’ve slipped.

It’s kinda cool when you’ve been here before, so you get to play the game a little different. And sometimes, you’ve made the same move before, but this time you got caught.

The difference is how you react to it.

I stopped getting up at 6AM, I stopped working out, I stopped eating healthy, I stopped it all. But I still showed up.

Showing up even when you’re tired is the biggest gift someone who’s down the rabbit hole of depression can do. It gets to a point though, where your body gives up.

That’s called a burn out. My body just gave up on Friday. And my anxiety was on the high, as so much was going on AT THE SAME TIME and I couldn’t keep up.

I’ve been living a low-key fast paced life but always manage to find so much downtime. Problem is when you get real downtime, you stop being productive. And that’s where it starts. You’re not fun anymore.

When you’re suddenly spending more time in your head. And don’t know how to explain or express your true feelings, because you’re afraid they’re going to judge you or think you’re crazy. Thing is, I’ve been here before, so I recognize what the issue is, and sometimes you just want to talk to somebody who’ll offer you a different perspective, and that’s where friends come in.

No, your friends are not your therapist’s, but what’s the point of having friends, if they don’t know what makes you… You.

We need to listen to each other more. And be super direct with each other as well. We’re grown. No one has time for games anymore. It is or it isn’t. Black and white. No grey area.

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