I’ve had so many people come and go from my life, it’s ridiculous.
I’m sure you’ve been through the same as well.
Best female friends, male friends. Colleagues, lovers, house mates, family, high school friends. The list is endless.
But what hurts and sucks the most is when you find people that you’re at par with and have an amazing connection with but they just disappear. Without a reason or even an excuse.
I was telling a friend on Friday night that I had an amazing time in their country this year but the experience was ruined by individuals who cannot understand what silence is.
Silence to me is so important. I can be in a group or with a person and be quiet, comfortably but the next person or the group will find my silence disturbing. Like something is wrong with me and I need to “talk it out”. I may be thinking, but these are my thoughts and feelings. If I’m still with you, haven’t left or called it a night, that means I am comfortable. I am ok. But clearly you’re not.
Leaving peoples lives, isn’t easy but a decision has to be made at times when it isn’t serving any sort of purpose for you.
I do that a lot. But off late I try my best to let the person know why I am cutting them out of my life rather than just disconnect and leave them wondering, because it actually does hurt and is dissapointing.
I try my best to not do to others what I wouldn’t want done to me.
But I forget at times that we live in a messed up world with selfish people who are in it for themselves and would do anything to get what they want irrespective of who they’re gonna hurt along the way.
And this realization is such a disappointment.